What have I been up to? Other than rambling of course...

Hello All!!

I know I wrote last about the Fête de Lumiere and I have been thinking about what has been going on since then. It was, after all, already two weekends ago! What I have been doing for the past week and a half? The truth is, I'm not quite sure. Perhaps falling back in love with France.

You see, I got here and, of course, was happy! I loved it!! It was all I remembered and all I wanted it to be. And then, for about 3 weeks or so, I was disappointed. I couldn't help but be frustrated as I picked out all the ways in which France is different from home. In essence, I was homesick. For the first time since arriving in France, I cried. I wanted to go home. I didn't tell this to many people back home for fear of scaring you or making you think I wasn't happy. Strangely enough, that wasn't the case. I somehow managed to still be happy while being beyond frustrated with the... well, the BS that is France. The grèveing (a made up Franglais word that combines the french word for strike "grève", with the typical English verb ending "ing"), the fermature (closing) of things on Mondays, the way you can't even go to the grocery store on Sunday, the way things close for 2 hours at lunch, the way there is poop all over all the sidewalks no matter where you go, the messed up French Post that has, I'm certain, lost one of my packages from home and took a ridiculously complicated method of delivering another, and the little things that my roommates did that just rubbed me the wrong way, got on my nerves.

But I can share these things with you now- even laugh about them a little. Why? Because I'm over it. Roommates are roommates- and as they come, mine are WONDERFUL!! I have been without computer for a month or so now as mine died of mother-board problems. My amazing roommates have been letting me use their computers as often as I need to do everything from real work for school, emailing home, facebooking and blogging and whatever else. They have been amazing! No roommate is perfect and of course there are little things that bug you, but that's normal. I have great roommates.

The French Post is the French Post. It sucks. I should, at some point, get everything that has been sent, assuming of course that the post man himself is competent enough to read my name on my mailbox (that was actually one of the problems.... one of them could not find my name... it's right there on the box...). I have little faith in the system, but it is a lesson learned. Please don't send me anything fragile or expensive, haha. I'm sure I will get whatever it is.... eventually. (You might think that as expensive it is to send things now that it would be a rockin' system.... but apparently not). Anyway, I've excepted it and thus am moving on.

And the other things... it's France. I've realized you have to take the good with the bad. And truthfully... it's not all bad.

I think I broke the spell one night when I had been out with Kim. I don't remember where we had been... it was right after the Fête de Lumiere I think... anyway, I was walking home. I had just parted ways with Kim- we live about 5 minutes from each other and we feel safe enough to walk those remaining 7 from which we part ways alone. As I walked up to Place de la Croix-Rousse I paused and just looked upon it. It truly is beautiful. "I like it best like this," I thought to myself, "with no one around, lit up slightly in the night." And then I began appreciating France again. It was that simple. The biggest truth of it that I realized is that I like Lyon best by night. It's beautiful and you can appreciate it because there are simply less people crowding your view. Once you are able to see it clearly, it is old and graceful and beautiful in architecture and style.

From there things progressed. I have had a few strange days at work where I have either not had to work at all or had specific classes off because of grèves or exams (it's finals time here too) and such. I've been in a better mood because I got done reading a depressing book and it's Christmas time so that helps. And most of all, my family is coming!! I can't help but be excited that 5 days from today I will be hugging them all!! What could make me happier?

So... outside of that I think the past couple weeks have passed very typically- I go to work, I come home, I knit, read, or meet up with friends. I have decided I need to explore more museums and I want to start teaching English privately and getting paid for it- which would be a nice way to earn some extra cash for my travel fund! I am slowly but surely discovering a variety of local establishments. For a while there I was sticking strictly to my salsa bars, but I have expanded to incorporate much more. I went out to one of the Bar Boats, called Marquis, with Lucy (an American from Chicago), Andrea (my German friend) and Carina (Andrea's sister). Will (my roommate) joined us later in the evening. We had a fun time dancing and whatnot. To be honest, one of the best parts of the evening was, once again, the walk home. Not only is Lyon by night amazing, but it is fantastically funny when Lucy drinks and has a hard time compartmentalizing her languages so she speaks a confusing melange (mix) of French, Spanish and Wololf (I think that's how you spell it- some Senegalese language she knows a little of). She ends up speaking very little English under these circumstances. It's marvelous. I love my multilingual friends! :)

And lastly, this evening I went to Groupe Biblique des Jeunes Adultes (Young Adult Bible Study). This time I got it right though and I didn't end up with all the 90 year olds. Rather I was in a room, reflecting on Romans chapter 6 and 7 with 5 other young adults like myself and the young priest. I happen to love Romans, even if chapter 7 confuses me a lot!! So it was a good discussion and, once again, a wonderful opportunity for me to focus on my faith. Always good.

That, I believe brings me to a close for now. I will, of course, keep you updated as I hope to visit museums, teach some private English lessons, and maybe even teach some dance in the new year!! What an exciting year to come!!

In the mean time, have a Wonderful Holiday everyone!!! Merry Christmas!! Happy New Year!! Wrap your arms around yourself and squeeze- this, of course, is your Christmas hug from me!

God Bless!

Fête de Lumiére

Good Afternoon/Good Evening... I suppose I could adjouter (add) Good Morning for those that open this at that point in time. I have a feeling that I will be Franglaising it up as these posts continue... it's just what natural when I speak and think now... I'll do my best to add the correct English term nearby :)

I'm in a good mood. I took ballet tonight, then ate delicious Pumpkin Cheesecake, which I am proud to say I made without proper measuring devices (in case anyone didn't know, grams is a weight device, not a volume device, so going from cups to grams is not as simple as it sounds. For example, a 1/2 cup of plain white sucre is 100 grams, but if you have granulated sucre (crap... sugar) 1/2 a cup is 75 grams. Now try finding the correct conversion for Cream Cheese on the internet... especially when you aren't really using cream cheese but the closest thing France has to it... which isn't exactly the same thing but if you futz with it it's not too bad. Anyway... good evening, ballet and Pumpkin Cheesecake!! (Even Olivier approved of my Cheesecake and he claims he doesn't like cheesecake- you'd have to have lived here for a while to understand I think, but that makes me really proud... secretly... I don't tell him that I care what he thinks about my cooking. It would be worse that way.)

Anyway... the real reason for this update- La Fête de Lumiére (Festival of Lights).

About a month ago, or perhaps even longer than that, I first heard about this grand fête (big festival) and was intrigued. There were supposed to be about 4 million tourists coming to Lyon for the weekend to see what was due to be a spectacular weekend. I was told that the city would be illuminated with... well light. There were to be light shows and fancy light fixtures and whatnot partout (everywhere). I was excited to see what brought tourists from all over to France's second largest city for a weekend!!

As we got closer to the weekend itself I began to realize just how many people really would be coming into town. Within my group of friends alone we'd have several visitors. Andrea's roommate from Germany, Marine's German boyfriend, Kim's American friend living somewhere near here, Lucy would have a friend in town, and then my friend, Andrew, who I had met in Caen 3 years ago and would be rejoining me in France as a language assistant in December. That's 5 additional people to the city right there... and we are just 5 etrangers (foreigners). Think of all the friends of the French who live closer and can come in easier! This was going to be one crazy party. Drinking in the streets, lights all over, good times!

Friday night came around and I barley had time to realize that the fête was starting-- I had been busy with work and trying to locate lost packages in the French postal system. But Friday night arrived sure enough and Kim asked if I wanted to go out to meet her two English friends who were in town. (What? More out of town friends?? Ok.) So we grabbed some food at the grocery store and headed back to her place quickly to eat before meeting up with her friends. On the way we came upon our first taste of lumiére (light). Giant Tetris!! You could play tetris! They had a big projector showing the game on the side of a building and on the other side of the street you could step on the right, left, and rotate arrows to control the pieces. Sweet! Kim and I took turns holding the groceries to play. Turns out it's harder than it looks- playing with your feet- but not too bad. This was going to be a fun weekend!!

We ate our food, drank some wine (of course) and then headed out to see her friends. We decided to walk in order to come across more lumiére. We ran into a few things as we were headed down the hill. A giant circle of light projected onto a wall that ended up being a smiley face because of the stuff that was on the side of the wall normally. Strange colored lights hung in trees. A giant tutu made out of that bright yellow cloth construction workers wear (which, incidentally, the French were to demonstrate their displeasure with something when there is a grève (strike) going on. I see these yellow construction vests daily at work currently as there is a strike going on against a reform in the schooling system. I have had a few classes canceled because of it. Ahhh the french). Good times. We rushed through the crowds as quickly as we could to meet up with Kim's two friends and found ourselves in a little bar off the main drag in Vieux Lyon (Old Lyon). We had a glass of Kir (kind of wine... made out of cassis, which is black current I believe) and chatted for a while. Then we all agreed on calling it an early night and we split up. Kim and I, both tired at this point, planned to take the metro, but due to the "monde" (when there are a lot of people the french say there is "trop du monde" or "beaucoup du monde", which means "too many of the world" or "lots of world" respectfully- literally translated of course- it really just means there is a expletive-ton of people!) we were forced to walk back.

Walking up the main drag we saw strange swirly lights in trees... that's it... Ok, I'm thinking, I must be missing something. Kim and I have every intention of going out on Saturday to really see it all. On the way back we happened upon La Fountaine des Poissons (Fountain of Fish). This was part of the Light Festival. There were giant plastic fish skeletons... sort of... that were white and then lit with different colors of light or back lit to create shadows on the walls around the square... neat... and strange... ok, well, we'll see the rest of it tomorrow, we were thinking as we made our way towards home.

Saturday arrived and Andrew came into town, along with several other tourists. We met up with Kim and her friend and we all hung out at Kim's for a while. Then, in an odd twist of events, we ended up sitting (with our shoes off) with a group of 9 girls in a Hawaiian bar that had overpriced hot chocolate and brownies. One or two of these 9 girls happened to be friends with Becca, the friend of Kim. So now there were 13 of us... ok. So after overpriced drinks we all headed up the hill- not my hill- the other one-- to Forviere.

I must say: Lots of people like forviere. I am not one of them. I think the view of the city is better from Croix Rousse (where I live) and I think Forviere itself is an ugly church. It doesn't make much sense to me really-- I'm sure there is Catholic doctrine to back it up somewhere, but there are 10 statues of men on the front (as opposed to 12, which would make much more sense) and there seem to be extra people at the scene of the Birth of Christ (also in statue form on the front of this church). I could probably live with that if it was the only downfall of the Cathedral. But you walk inside and it's just downright gaudy. There is gold mosaic everywhere and it's just TOO decorated. What happened simple elegance? It's terrible!! And what a waste of wealth!! Yes, I understand the desire to offer God an beautiful House... but really? This is a little extreme. If I was God I would walk back outside and sit on the steps with the poor people... the view is nicer and it doesn't offend your eyes.

So anyway, our group of 13 walks up this massive hill to see the ugly church and the view. We do this mostly for the visitors in our group. After all the picture taking and whatnot is complete we are ready to redescend (does that word work in English?? Do re-descend? whatever... to go back down) and we realize we are missing Kim and Becca. No one can find them. I pull out my phone, which of course is almost dead, and I call Kim. She and Becca are inside the church. "Ok," I say, "We'll meet you in front of the church." We hang up. There is singing and praying going on inside the church (as it turns out the Fête de Lumiére was originally a thanksgiving day to Mary for saving them from some plague or something). So we all went inside briefly to check it out, but I left quickly to save my eyes from the ostentatiousness around me.

We waited and waited and Kim and Becca were no where to be found. I tried again to call Kim and she didn't answer. Well, at least they were together... the group of 9 girls were ready to move on and since Andrew and I didn't really know what to do we just kind of went along with them. I sent a text to Kim saying we were leaving and off we went. Just as we were rounding the corner however, Kim and Becca were spotted- they were just leaving the church. We waited for them and all 13 of us went down the hill together.

At the bottom of the hill we found ourselves at the other main church in Lyon- St. Jean. This church is much more beautiful!! Very typical French Gothic architecture inside and out. And these lights were impressive! The projection on the front of the church added such color and decoration. All the statues had been taken down off the front of the church years and years before- when the stone was more valuable. The projection showed the statues and was very... charming. (My first thought was to say stunning or breath-taking... but truly, it wasn't THAT cool... it was cool, but not like "Oh my goodness that's amazing" cool).

So we stood there for a while, listening to more singing from inside and taking it all in... along with the "monde" that was all around us. As we were preparing to leave, once again Kim and Becca were missing. This time the group didn't want to wait and my phone had died so off we went without them- Andrew and I and these 9 girls we didn't really know. We held hands through the crowd like kindergartners on their way to music or gym or whatever class takes them out of their normal classroom. We wandered around, looking at the lights- saw the Fountaine des Poissons again and some large building front that had a light show on it. Then weaved through the crowd trying to get to Place de Terreaux- where the really good light show was supposed to be. Getting stuck in crowds and closed off streets we stopped to grab some vin chaud (hot wine- yummy!) and a few people also got Kebabs. We finally made it to Place de Terreaux and saw the big light show. It reminded me of going to the Naval Base for the 4th of July, only not as good. It was neat. Like the things they projected onto the buildings were cool... at one point they splattered the Art Museum and the City Hall with paint (not really, just with light projection) and that looked really cool. But overall it wasn't what I would call spectacular, just neat.

We finally met back up with Kim- I got enough juice in my phone to call her one last time and we met up at Place de Terreaux- Becca then took off with another group of 8 friends she had run into. Kim and our large group all went to sit down in a bar after walking around so much in the cold. We had one drink and then Kim, Andrew and I decided it was time our large group of 12 become a little group of 3. It was, by this time, about 10:15 and we were considering heading out-- this wasn't going to be possible with a group of 12. So we delicately thanked our new friends for the afternoon and departed for Kim's apartment, where we took a few minutes to recharge phones and strip off layers before heading to the warmth of a crowded bar.

Barbarrous is a bar Kim's French boyfriend showed us a weekend or two previously. It's a fun bar with lots of cheap shots and great music for dancing- even if there's not really that much space. This, we discovered, is where the French people come. Many of the bars we'd been to were usually filled with a few French and a lot of foreigners-- Lyon is a very cultural city-- with 3 universities plus the assistantship program it's not uncommon to hear a lot of spanish and english while out and about and it's very possible to hear a little German every now and again (maybe it's just the friends I've made plus the salsaing I love, but that's what I've found at least). But this bar has all the French people!! We danced and tried to hook Andrew up with a couple of French girls (sadly, no go... French women are too closed off and uptight). It was a fun evening.

On Sunday Andrew and I grabbed baguette sandwiches and headed to the stellar Croix-Rousse view to eat them. Then we met up with Andrea (my German friend) and Jenni (her roommate) for a hot chocolate before taking Andrew to catch his bus back home- which was due to depart around 3:30.

After Andrew left (the unmarked bus stop we just kind of assumed was where we were supposed to be despite the lack of any information telling us so- lucky for us we guessed right), I wandered into Old Lyon with no real intentions and happened upon Christmas Carols in English- due to start at 4PM. SWEET!!!! This, truthfully, was the best part of the weekend!! When we started singing O Come All Ye Faithful I almost started to cry-- I had missed this expression of Faith- so simple and so pure- but so real and in a language I am sure to understand. :) It was a beautiful ceremony with carols and readings and a fun part where children came up and played Go Tell It On The Mountain with bells based on the color of their bell and flashcards.

Then I met up with Kim and we headed to Marine's to meet her German boyfriend and have dinner. Due to crazy metros and trop du monde we were a little over an hour late. Oops!! But we managed to have a lovely night and then Kim and I went home to crash as Marine took Johannas to the bus station.

Monday started as Mondays tend to- I slept in. Then I prepared holiday lessons plans for my classes for the next two weeks. I made early dinner and headed out once more. Having only spent about 40 minutes or so with Andrea and Jenni the whole weekend long I headed back to Old Lyon to meet them for a drink. We went to one pub and then another- just to show Jenni around a little. We chatted and joked and even played a round of Never Have I Ever- a game I told them about when I was in Germany for break. (If you don't know what it is... I'll explain later... or google it.) It was an enjoyable evening. But it had been a long evening and it was, after all, a Monday night. So we headed for home.

Once again, due to "la monde", the metro was still messed up and I had to walk most the way home. Monday was the 8th- the typical day they celebrate the fête de lumiére. Everyone had put candles in their windows. It was neat.

After the whole weekend, the whole experience, my first ever Fête de Lumiére, I was left... underwhelmed. As I've said repeatedly... it was charming and neat. It wasn't something I would come in from out of town specifically to see. It just wasn't that cool. The lights in Time Square or in Downtown Chicago coupled with the window decorations and whatnot totally outdo the whole business. It's that it wasn't cool in the spots where it was... I guess the thing is that it wasn't EVERYWHERE. There should have been MORE light. The swirls in the trees along the main street just aren't enough to impress the Americans I guess. Oh well, it was fun.

And thus life returns to normal. As normal as life in a foreign city can be. I might not have class on Friday... the teachers (and students) might still be on strike... normal.

Revelations and Contemplations

Perhaps it is just that time, or perhaps my spontaneity has momentarily taken a hike, but I have been thinking A LOT lately...

Thinking is good and thinking is bad. Thinking leads to good, solid, stable decisions and a planned out future full of security. Thinking also can lead to missed chances because you worry too much about what's GOING to happen and you miss out on what's currently HAPPENING. Thinking can take a simple thing and turn it into a monster in your brain. This is how things usually happen for me.

Thinking can also lead to simple discoveries. A while ago my brother told me that your taste buds change every 7 years so he continues to try foods he used to not like because it's possible that he likes them today. Since then I have been doing the same. Since in France I have given a chance to several things I used to avoid and found pleasurable results. Strawberry jam for example. Growing up I was a strictly Grape jelly on my PBJ kind of gal! No messing around with that strawberry crap! But... I'm in France-- they make wine with their grapes, not jelly. And thus I have been using all the other wondrous jellies and jams that exist in the world- like Cassis (black current) and Mur (blackberry) and, of course, Fraise (Strawberry). And believe it or not, I have truly come to enjoy the Strawberry jam. It's quite delicious.

I've had the same realization with tea. I used to hate tea. Then I started drinking it here with some of my tea-drinking friends and discovered that it's actually quite good. Hmm, who'da thunk it?

I've had bigger realizations too. For example, I came to France thinking I wanted to live here for a few years. I didn't know when I would be returning home. I don't feel the same way anymore. After 2 and a half months here (less than half the time I WILL spend during this sejour yet just shy of doubling the total amount of time I've spent in the country over the past 3 years), I have discovered that perhaps this isn't where I want to be. Don't get me wrong- I LOVE it here. I truly do. And you never know, maybe once things work out with this carte desejour business I will feel differently... but I get homesick more than I ever did when I was in Normandy. I get frustrated with the French way of doing things more often than I ever did back then either. I've gotten over the "anti-france" stint I was on for about a week and a half, but I've come to the realization that the things that are grinding on me are simple cultural differences that won't ever change. I'm either going to have to become accustomed to them or I'm going to have to move on.

And then there are the contemplations... what am I going to do in May when my contract is up? Can I extend my contract to stay an extra 2 months? (I know, it doesn't make sense-- I want to stay and I'm not sure I do... I'm a weirdo really.) Do I have enough money set aside/ will I have enough money set aside that I could just travel for a month or so when my contract is up? Do I want to start grad school in the fall of next year? Is that even possible? Where do I want to go to school and what are the science requirements for the program? Do I have to go back to undergrad in order to make this work? Where do I want to be at this point in time next year? Do I want to stay in Europe? Yes-- that answer is always yes. Just because I'm feeling... prepared to leave, we'll put it that way, France- that doesn't mean I don't still LOVE and want to stay in Europe!! Ireland, Scotland and England are all, for the most part, unexplored English speaking territory-- AND they have grad schools that have programs that will be accredited back home. Germany and Italy are places I'd like to visit... along with the rest of Europe, but I can't see myself living there- mostly because I don't speak the languages and doing Physical Therapy in Italian or German would suck-- I wouldn't understand anything and chances are any degree I managed to come out with wouldn't mean anything back home. Where do I want to go? What do I want to do? And how soon do I want to do it?

There was a time when I didn't have a back up plan- I just knew that coming to France was what God wanted me to do and so I prayed that the means I found was the means He wanted me to find. I'd like to have that sort of trust again- to know that He has a plan for me and that as long as I continue asking guidance that I will follow it. FAIL... I like to plan... I like to know ahead of time... and how do you balance that sort of blind trust and yet still make provisions? How do you get where God wants you to go without preparing the way? But how do you prepare the way if you don't know where you're going? **sigh**

There are other things I'm contemplating too... but I suppose not everything can be for the public eye... besides, these entries get to be too long as it is. ;)

Substitute Thanksgiving x 2

I've had a few people ask how my Thanksgiving was, so I'll try to write a brief synopsis of my double substitute Thanksgivings :)

On Wednesday night I went shopping with two of the other Americans and we made mashed potatoes, gravy, pecan pie and pumpkin cheesecake. I believe I told you about this already-- it was wonderful!

On Thursday I took the mashed potatoes and gravy with me to work. I handed them off to one of the teachers who said he would leave them in the fridge in the cafeteria (which they all call a cantine) and I could get them any time. Great. I taught my classes, trying to teach a little bit about what Thanksgiving really is and why it's a special holiday that everyone should celebrate- everyone should take the opportunity to think about the things in their life they are grateful for.

On Thursday afternoon I found the crappiest site ever that you can watch the Thanksgiving Day Parade on for free-- there is no sound and you can't see anything at Harold Square, but at least I saw a few balloons go by and whatnot. Then my family called and I talked to them for 20 minutes- which was wonderful!!

That evening when Olivia, the history teacher who loves American culture who would be hosting my Thanksgiving, got done with work we went to go get my mashed potatoes and found the Cantine locked... we got the key and found that the fridge was also locked... and for that we couldn't find the key. So, no mashed potatoes and gravy...

So we stopped at a store on the way home to get new potatoes and I remade mashed potatoes while Olivia cooked the chicken. Then I remade gravy that wasn't anywhere near as good as the first time. Oh well. We had chicken and mashed potatoes and pumpkin pie (SHE MADE PUMPKIN PIE!! It was awesome!!)

The next morning I woke up to find that her cat had peed in my boots. :( She lent me shoes for the day and I'm still trying to figure out if my boots are salvageable or not.

On Saturday we had a large Thanksgiving Fest for all the Americans and the internationals we invited-- German, British, Irish... they all experienced their first Turkey Day, which was super fun but a little interesting. We were supposed to eat around 4 but some people didn't know when it stared and showed up later. Vince and Jane, our hosts, put the turkey in the oven at 2, so clearly it wasn't done on time. We all dug into the side dishes everyone had brought around 4:30 and then the desserts immediately afterwards. My pumpkin cheesecake was amazing and everyone loved it. I even got a few requests for the recipe. :)

We basically sat and stood around everywhere-- there where about 35 people there and no furniture. They had borrowed a few chairs from the school and there were two mattresses on the floor. This was perfect as if there was any furniture there wouldn't have been enough space for everyone. We formed little clumps, changed our clumps, mingled, ate, drank lots of wine. It was great. Around 8:30 the turkey was done and we took the baguettes someone had brought and made Turkey sandwiches- WONDERFUL!!

Then around 10ish a smaller group of us: Andrea (German girl I stayed with over my birthday), Kim (American from Milwaukee), Kim's french boyfriend (Vivian), Kim's french roommate (Olivier), Lucy (American from Chicago), Michelle (Irish girl I went to Annecy with) and I all went out to this great little bar that Vivian knew where they had cheap shots and good music. It was a fun evening and a stellar substitute thanksgiving!!

I hope your Turkey Day was wonderful and you're all starting out the Christmas season with warm fuzzy feelings of love, family, good food and good friends!! Take care!

Note: There will eventually be pictures here... when I figure out A)how to get pictures off of my camera and onto my roommate's computer as he doesn't have canon software... and B)how to add pictures into the blog itself... I'm not that computer savey..